What does it mean word for word?
The phrase is composed of kirai (dislike/hate), dakedo (but/although) and suki (like/love).
Which one should you use?
Instead of using the much more intense aishiteru (I love you), this phrase uses suki (like/love) to describe the complex, everyday tension of conflicting feelings.
Is there a formal and an informal way to say it?
The default form 嫌いだけど、好き is informal and is typically used between close friends, partners or in casual internal monologues.
How does it change in a sentence?
You can make the phrase more polite and complete by adding desu to the end, resulting in 嫌いだけど、好きです. To intensify the affection, you can add the prefix dai- to the word for like, forming 嫌いだけど、大好き to mean "I hate you, but I love you very much."
How do you pronounce it?
kirai dakedo, suki
When do people say it?
In Japan, expressions of extreme emotions, such as love or hate, are generally considered private and are not openly expressed in public.
Did you know?
- The phrase is closely tied to the tsundere archetype in pop culture, describing characters who mask their affection with a cold or hostile exterior.
- In Japanese romantic contexts, using the word suki can actually feel more heavy and sincere than the dramatic aishiteru, which is often reserved for grand, cinematic gestures.
- The word kirai is used more frequently and more casually in Japanese than 'hate' is used in English, often simply meaning 'I don't like this' regarding food or hobbies.
Examples in context
- あなたは私にとって特別な存在で、時には嫌いになりながらも同時に愛しています。You are a special presence to me, and even though I sometimes hate you, I also love you at the same time.
- 嫌いなのに好きだよ。Even though I hate you, I still love you.
- 好きなのに嫌いだなんて、私って変わってるよね。It's strange how even though I like you, I also hate you.
- 嫌いだけど、好きだよ。Kirai dakedo, suki da yo.I hate you, but I love you.
- 本当に嫌いだけど、好きなんです。Hontou ni kirai dakedo, suki nan desu.I really hate you, but I love you.
- 嫌いだけど、好き。そんな複雑な気持ち。Kirai dakedo, suki. Sonna fukuzatuna kimochi.I hate you, but I love you. Such complex feelings.
Example conversation
Ren and Yui are arguing about something silly during a walk.
- 蓮 Renもう、本当に嫌いだけど、好きだよ。Mou, hontou ni kirai dakedo, suki da yo.Geez, I really hate you, but I love you.
- 結衣 Yui蓮くん、また変なこと言ってる。Ren-kun, mata henna koto itteru.Ren, you're saying strange things again.
- 蓮 Ren本心なんだよ。Honshin nan da yo.I mean it.
- 結衣 Yuiふふ、分かってるよ。Fufu, wakatteru yo.Hehe, I know.
